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He made a halfhearted attempt at downing a few bites, then pushed his plate away from him. “I’m no good at games, Claire.”
She poured more butter pecan syrup over her short stack. “Too bad,” she said, mustering up a smile. “I happen to be the world’s greatest armchair Wheel of Fortune player in Paradise Point.”
He didn’t smile back at her. “That’s not what I’m talking about.”
“Then maybe you’d better tell me what you are talking about.” Billy Jr. and Ryan hadn’t had a falling out. At least not one she knew about. “I know I haven’t been carrying my share of the load the last few days. I promise I’ll fax you a copy of the catering menu for the soccer dinner—”
“Was it serious?”
She had never felt more clueless in her life. “I don’t know. Maybe you’d better tell me what ‘it’ is before I answer.”
“Olivia’s brother.”
She couldn’t speak. She didn’t want to lie, and she couldn’t tell the truth.
“Okay,” he said after a long, uncomfortable silence. “It’s not my business. I know that.”
“So why did you ask?”
“I like you, Claire. A hell of a lot. But if there’s someone else in the picture, I want to know.”
“David, I—”
“I’m asking a lot. I know it. But I spent a long time in second place when I didn’t know there was another man in first, and it’s not something I want to do again.”
Her throat tightened. She knew all about second place. “You’re a nice guy, David.”
“But—?”
“But we don’t know each other.”
“We’ve known each other for years.”
“As parents, but not as people.”
“There’s an easy fix for that. Let’s go out for dinner tomorrow night. I won’t mention kids if you don’t.”
“I’m really not such a great bet these days, David. Between the kids, my father, the bar, and now working for Olivia and Rose at Cuppa, I—”
“That’s bullshit.”
“What?”
“You heard me. We’re both busy. That’s a given. I find time for tennis. You find time for poker.”
“That’s different.”
“If there’s something between you and that guy, tell me, and we’ll go back to being PTA buddies. I like you, Claire. I like sitting here with you. I’d like to see where this could go, but I want to know the rules.”
“There’s nothing between Corin and me.” Not anymore. Not after seeing that look in his eyes.
He didn’t try to hide his relief. “So take a chance, Claire Meehan O’Malley. Why not try a nice guy this time around.
Forget pizza with the kids and let me take you to Chadwick’s tomorrow night for lobster. What do you say?”
Billy was almost three years gone, and Corin had never been anything but a wonderful dream. She could have been anyone this morning, Maddy or Barney Kurkowski or Aidan, for all he seemed to care. There hadn’t been a flicker of anything beyond polite recognition when he said hello.
That’s what you wanted, isn’t it? The last thing you needed was for him to sweep you into an embrace and set the whole town talking.
She had spent the last few days with her gut twisted into a series of sailor’s knots, worrying about what kind of scene he might cause when he finally showed up. He had every right to be angry. She had been less than kind to him in the past, completely blind to the pain her actions caused him. She had done as much damage, in her own way, as Billy had.
Corin knew her secrets. He knew her family’s secrets. He had been dangerously angry when they parted on the Boardwalk eight years ago. He could have easily taken that information and used it to hurt her the way she had hurt him. He still could. There was no statute of limitations on the damage he could cause if he wanted to, but she doubted now if he even remembered. She should be grateful there wasn’t the slightest degree of warmth in his eyes when he saw her this morning, not the slightest hint of what they had shared.
Thank God they had both moved on. He deserved to be happy, even though she doubted he would ever stop moving long enough to give happiness a chance to find him. He had a restless nature, a questing soul that took him to places even the map makers had yet to find. The thought of him living out his days in Paradise Point with her was as funny as the thought of her hitting the road with him in search of adventure.
Clearly some things were not meant to be.
She was okay with that. More than okay.
Across the table David Fenelli was waiting for an answer. It wasn’t a proposal of marriage. Just a dinner invitation from a nice guy she had known forever. She could spend the rest of her life trapped in the past, or she could begin the slow process of accepting the fact that the future might never arrive. All she really had, all anyone had, was now.
David was smart and funny and bone-deep kind. She could do a hell of a lot worse and probably not a whole lot better. Everyone liked him, from her father to Olivia to her kids. She wouldn’t have to introduce him, explain him, or apologize for him. David would fit right into her life as if he had always been there.
And Corin had already seen them together. This would only be further proof, as if he needed or wanted any, that her life was rich and full and happy. Let him think she was busy every night of the week, too busy to wonder about what might have been.
Let him see her with David everywhere he looked. At Chadwick’s, or waiting for the school bus on Main Street, or laughing together at O’Malley’s. Let him know she had made the right choice, the only choice, and that she had no regrets.
“Dinner sounds great,” she said finally, trying to look past the expression of relief and anticipation in his eyes. “I love lobster.”
He would pick her up at seven at the house. Maybe they would catch a movie later on. Maybe not. They agreed to follow the evening wherever it led.
David would never hurt her or ask more of her than she had to give. He was a good man with a good heart, and he deserved better than being any woman’s second best.
It might not have been the most romantically flattering thing she had ever thought about a man, but it was probably the most honest. That had to count for something.
Chapter Eighteen
THE INTERVIEW WITH the officers of the seventy-fifth graduating class of Paradise Point High School began at eight in the morning and was scheduled to end no later than ten, but by ten-thirty, Kelly was beginning to think they would be trapped in the library listening to Andrea Portnow prattle on about past proms until it was time for the one hundredth graduating class to receive their diplomas.
Peter Lassiter had begun the interview, even though his assistant Crystal still hadn’t shown up for work. A half-asleep cameraman and one sound guy recorded the conversations for posterity when they weren’t catching a quick forty winks when the boss wasn’t looking. She had had to excuse herself twice for bathroom runs, something that hadn’t gone unnoticed by her assembled classmates.
Seth caught her eye across the table, and it was almost as good as a hug. He would be heading over to work at The Candlelight as soon as the meeting broke up, while she planned to race up to the mall at Bay Bridge to purchase a home pregnancy kit. By this time tomorrow they would know what the future had in store for them.
The real future, not the fantasy they had been constructing since they were seven years old, not the orderly, well-thought-out future they spouted for Lassiter and his tape recorder. The one they were going to have to deal with every day for the rest of their lives.
“Kelly, wake up! I asked you a question.” Andrea Portnow’s braying laugh snapped Kelly back to attention.
“Sorry.” Kelly’s smile was automatic. “I was thinking about—”
“We need the folder with the pictures.” Andrea, the class historian, was all angles and eyes, a Disney animation come to life.
“Pictures?”
Andrea sighed loudly. “The ones from the last reunion
. You took them home to scan them, remember?”
No, she didn’t remember. Not even a little.
Andrea shrieked and pretended to fall back into her chair in a dead faint. “Are you telling me that the perfect Kelly O’Malley actually forgot something?”
Everyone around the table burst into laughter. Everyone, that was, except Kelly and Seth.
“I left the folder home,” she said, her voice painfully tight. “If you want, I’ll go get it.”
Peter Lassiter gave her one of his comforting smiles. “It’s not like we need it today,” he said. “You can drop the photos off tomorrow.”
“You don’t know how totally weird this is,” Andrea went on. “I mean, Kelly is the one who never makes mistakes.”
“Drop it, Andrea.” Seth was clearly struggling to rein in his anger. “Everyone makes mistakes.”
“Not Kelly,” Tino DeSantis said. “The rest of us screw up all the time and depend on Kel to keep it all together.”
“Guess there’s a first time for everything,” Brian Gomez, a gifted musician headed for Juilliard, said with a shake of his head. “My idol lies broken at my feet.”
Any other time that might have seemed funny to Kelly, albeit in an ironic kind of way, but today it cut through her like a well-honed blade.
“I’m sorry.” She stood up, hands shaking. “I’ll be back in a sec.”
“Geez, Kel!” Andrea rolled her eyes. “Maybe if you quit downing those water bottles you wouldn’t have to go so much.”
“You don’t have to explain anything to us, Kelly.” Peter Lassiter gave her an easy smile. “We’ll still be here when you get back.”
Kelly almost cried with relief when Crystal chose that moment to burst into the room, waving dark blue and silver fingertips as she called out, “Anyone want to see Uranus?”
She used the resulting laughter and commotion to make a dash to the bathroom one more time as her stomach launched another revolt against the rest of her body.
Afterward she washed her face at the sink and rinsed out her mouth. She had to get out of there. She couldn’t keep her mind focused on the interview, no matter how hard she tried. First they had given an overview of the school and its place in the town’s history. Then they had spent at least thirty minutes arguing over when the school’s colors changed from cranberry and navy to navy and white. Finally she had managed to present her material about past valedictorians and the proud history of scholarship and achievement of the alumni. Seth and Brian Gomez still had to detail the laundry list of accomplishments garnered by the sports teams over the years, and after that Andrea and Tino would launch themselves headfirst into a glowing review of the theater department and then it would be too late.
She had to get out of there. For a moment Andrea’s teasing had almost brought her to tears. Her emotions were ragged and raw, and it wouldn’t take much to send her spinning out of control. Not to mention the fact that there had to be a limit to how many times you could excuse yourself to use the bathroom before somebody called the doctor. Andrea had been shooting quizzical looks in her direction for at least an hour now, and there was no way she wanted to be on her radar screen for any longer than necessary.
Besides, it was almost eleven o’clock, and she still had to drive over to the drugstore at the Bay Bridge mall so she could buy the pregnancy test without everyone in Paradise Point knowing she was late. Mrs. DiFalco expected her at The Candelight around three o’clock, and time was running out.
She pulled out her phone and pressed in Kathleen’s cell number.
“Wake up and call me back on my cell in five minutes,” she whispered to her puzzled and sleepy cousin.
“Why?”
“If I don’t get out of here, I’m going to go crazy.”
“Where are you?”
“Remember Andrea Portnow?”
“Tim Portnow’s snotty little sister?”
“I’m stuck here at school with her, and if you don’t help me get out of here, I’m going to pull her hair extensions out with my bare hands. Call me and pretend your car stalled and you need a lift.”
“Are you okay, Kel? This isn’t like you.”
Saint Kelly. The world’s only living perfect teenager. The one who never lied, never made mistakes, never had a bad hair day . . . the one who would never find herself knocked up a few weeks before graduation.
“Are you going to help me or not?”
“Hang up. I’ll count to two hundred and call you back.”
O’Malley power to the rescue. Five minutes later, her cell phone rang, and ten seconds after that she was on her way to the mall.
Lying was easy once you got the hang of it.
IT SEEMED LIKE everyone in South Jersey had all decided to converge on the Bay Bridge mall that morning. The parking lots were jammed, and Maddy had to drive up and down the rows like a circling shark waiting to pounce on the first defenseless spot that opened up. She managed to beat out a Lexus for a spot near Bloomingdale’s and raced into the mall toward Lorelei’s, the lingerie store Gina had recommended.
She hadn’t been in the store more than two minutes when she found out that Gina hadn’t lied. When you saw the right one, you knew. Boy, did you know. The second Maddy’s gaze landed on the icy blue satin and lace confection, she went giddy with excitement. Her cousin was clearly an erotic genius. The tap pants and camisole were sexy without being obvious. They didn’t shine a spotlight on your natural charms; instead, they invited a man closer to discover those charms for himself.
And they even hid stretch marks and cellulite.
What more could a woman ask for?
She gathered up tap pants, camisole, flirty satin slides in the same shade of icy blue, and a matching satin robe that tied at the waist and stopped midthigh.
“Somebody’s going to have a great weekend,” said the salesclerk with a broad wink. “Lucky girl!”
“I really am,” Maddy said as she handed over her credit card. After all the months of bad timing and missed opportunities, they were finally going to—
Ripe, juicy images rose up in front of her and sent pleasurable ripples of anticipation up her spine. Just a few hours from now they would be alone together in that beautiful tower suite in Spring Lake, with nothing but their imaginations and a bottle of champagne for company.
She floated out of Lorelei’s and was halfway to her car when she remembered one more very important item and doubled back to CVS. She had stopped taking the Pill when she found out she was pregnant with Hannah, and there hadn’t been any reason to start taking it again since total abstinence had proved itself to be a highly effective form of birth control. Aidan struck her as the kind of man who would make sure they were both protected, but she was a modern woman, after all, and—well, better safe than sorry.
Condoms were located in the back of the store near the pharmacy, tucked away with contraceptive foams, jellies, creams, and cigarettes for afterward. The positioning struck her as odd but not half as odd as the limitless varieties of condoms available. Large. Extra Large. (No mention of small or medium in deference to the sensitive male ego.) Ribbed. Smooth. Natural. Every color of the rainbow. Reservoir tip. Lubricated. Flavored. Whatever happened to plain old condoms, the kind that minded their own business but got the job done? She chose a box with the least number of bells and whistles, metaphorically speaking, and was about to take it up to the register when she heard a familiar female voice.
“. . . and this is the most reliable?”
“That’s what I said.” The pharmacist had clearly answered that question many times before.
Maddy prayed the purchase was a box of condoms and not an EPT.
“I’ll take it.”
“That’ll be twelve seventy-five.”
She had only seconds to make a decision. Did she preserve Kelly’s privacy and duck behind the display until the girl left the store or did she—
“Can I help you, ma’am?” an eager sales clerk asked.
S
he almost jumped out of her shoes. “No, no thanks. That’s okay.”
“If you’re looking for something in particular, I can—”
“Really, I’m fine. I’m just—”
“Maddy!” Kelly popped up behind the eager salesclerk. “What are you doing here?” Her eyes drifted down to the box of condoms, and her cheeks reddened. “Oh!”
It could have been worse. She might have been wearing the tap pants and camisole, but it was still pretty embarrassing for both of them. “I didn’t know you shopped this mall.”
“I—uh, I don’t usually but . . .”
Kelly clutched a paper bag like it was all that stood between her and disaster. Every maternal instinct Maddy possessed screamed for her to grab that bag and see exactly what the girl had purchased. Maybe there was a reason why their paths kept crossing this way. Nobody else in Kelly’s family seemed to see the clues, but Maddy did, and they all added up to just one thing.
It’s none of your business. She’s almost eighteen. If she wants to talk to you, she will. It’s not like you’re doing anything to stop her.
Kelly dropped the paper bag into her canvas backpack. “I guess I’d better get going. I have to work at the library before I show up at The Candlelight.”
Here’s your chance, Maddy. You’re standing there with a box of condoms in your hand. You’ll never get a better opening line than that. Say something . . . just get her talking . . . maybe there’s really nothing going on . . . you’re not going to know if you don’t reach out to her.
But did it have to be today? She wasn’t a mother today. She wasn’t an almost-stepmother. Today she was a woman who was eager to be with the man she loved for the very first time. Twenty-four hours. That was all she asked for. Kelly had done just fine without her for almost eighteen years. Surely one more day wasn’t too much to ask for.
Maddy glanced at her watch. “I have to run, too. Aidan’s picking me up in ninety-seven minutes.”
They were both parked near Bloomie’s, so they headed toward the store exit.
“Miss!” The eager clerk darted into Maddy’s path. “I think you forgot something.”